CHEMA, "I'M A COOK" 

Carmen’s son, Chema, asked my Grandfather, “Do you need anymore workers?”   My grandfather said, “No, all I need is a cook.” “Well, I’m a cook.”  My Grandfather looks around like that’s the first time I’ve ever heard that you were a cook and said, “I thought you were a mechanic?”  “I’m a mechanic too.”   My Grandfather said, “But you’re also a cook?”  “Oh yeah, I’m a cook.  You need a cook, I’m a cook.”  “Well, okay, we’ll take you as a cook.”

The first day he took him, he asked him, “What are you going to make for the boys?”  “I’m going to make rice and meat.”  “That’s good.  And of course beans.”  “Oh yeah, beans, rice and meat with pan de campo.”  “Okay,” my Grandfather went away with the workers out there digging holes.  He left Chema there cooking. 

Later my Grandfather walked back and Chema was scooping out rice from the pot, pouring it into another pan.  The rice would rise and start bowling over and spilling over. “What’s going on Chema?”  “This rice, it keeps coming out.  I’m scooping it out.  I don’t know why it keeps coming out.”  “Well how much did you put in there?”  Chema said, “Well there’s 8 of us, so I put 8 cups of rice.”  “That’s too much.”  “Oh it is?”  “Oh yeah, it’s too much.  Save that rice for something else.  Two cups of rice would have been enough.”

At another time, My grandfather had gotten a job somewhere where they offered him some alligator meat.  Chema was the cook again and told him, “I can cook anything, I’ll make the alligator meat.”  So Chema puts it in the pan and he hears it popping.  He opens the lid and it starts popping out all over the place. He covers it up again.  Puom, puom, puom.  My grandfather comes over, “What’s going on Chema?”  “This alligator meat, it keeps popping out of the pan.”  He takes the lid off and it flies all over the place. “I can’t keep it in there. It doesn’t want to stay down.”  My grandfather goes,  “Maybe take it off the hot part of the fire.”  “Okay.”

But that was the cook Chema, “Oh yeah, I’m a cook.”  Better stick to being an auto mechanic and open up an auto parts store.  What are the parts you sell?   We have no idea but if you need something you can come and look, for a low price.
(see Fixing the Car for the rest of the story)

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